AVOID SLEEPING IN CHURCH

Someone was sleeping in the church last Sunday and the usher woke him up...
Immediately he woke him up from his sleep the next thing he heard was the pastor saying... "Please stand up"
He stood up without knowing the reason and the people were clapping for me..!! Surprisingly for him, he look around he was the only one standing up ...then the next thing he heard. ...
*PASTOR*:- "Thank you Jesus!!! Any other person who will give us another one million naira for our church project ?"
*He Fainted*...hahaha... Abeg don't laugh all alone ok ....forward as received.

Comments

Admit it u don't come here for hunting?

Jon was excited about his new rifle and wanted to try it out, so he went bear hunting. He spotted a small black bear and shot it. There was then a tap on his shoulder and he turned round to see a larger black bear. The black bear said "You've got two choices, I either maul you to death or we have sex." Jon decided to bend over. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Jon soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip, found the black bear, and shot it. Immediately, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a big brown bear stood right next to him. The brown bear said, "That was a huge mistake, Jon. You've got two choices. Either I maul you to death or we'll have rough sex." Again, Jon thought it was better to comply. Although he survived, it was several months before Jon finally recovered. Outraged, he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the brown bear and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then ...

You don't need atomic bomb to destroy any nation

At the entrance gate of a university in South Africa the following message was posted for contemplation: *"Destroying any nation does not require the use of atomic bombs or the use of long range missiles. _It only requires lowering the quality of education and allowing cheating in the examinations by the students._"* Patients die at the hands of such doctors. Buildings collapse at the hands of such engineers. Money is lost at the hands of such economists & accountants. Humanity dies at the hands of such religious scholars. Justice is lost at the hands of such judges... *"The collapse of education is the collapse of the nation."* We need to inculcate d spirit of quality education in our children.

ZUMA'S STATUE

I love this piece. The writer is a good Bible student Written by Adakole Emmanuel J. ROCHAS chapter 6 vs 1-21 AN ACCOUNT OF THE KING'S GRAVEN IMAGE 1. And it came to pass that a certain Governor from the East by the name Rochas the son of Okorocha who ruleth over the province of Imo, sent a messenger to the kingdom of the Southern country of Africa. 2. And he said to the messenger, in this manner shall ye speak to the king, "long live the king! thou art highly favoured in the the eyes of my Governor, even among the people of the province of Imo, therefore come this day to meat in my kingdom that though mayest be honoured" 3. And the messenger did according to the words of the Governor. 4. And it came to pass that the king of the Southern country of Africa by the name, Jacob the son of Zuma, entered into the province of Imo, even into the city of Oweri, the dwelling place of the Governor. 5. And Rochas the son of Okorocha made a great feast and prepared a banquet...

Laugh out loud

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